Don’t Beat Yourself Up


I cannot count the number of times I’ve had someone tell me, Don’t beat yourself up!

Apparently I’m not alone. There are many “people-pleasing” folk out there like me who are way too hard on themselves…and really for no good reason. I wish I could say I have a mild tendency to beat myself up, but I’d be lying. I am my own worst critic about everything- self-image, child raising, cooking, writing… I could go on.

I always knew this was an area of my life that needed to be addressed, but it wasn’t until recently that I realized how much damage was (and is) being done. And it took a photo of Gideon to finally get my attention.

I love photos of sleeping babies (especially my own), but the one above highlighted something about Gideon that breaks my heart as a parent- the physical damage he does when he hits himself. In fact, just a few hours before I took this photo, he was self-stemming (hitting himself), and I actually said to him “don’t beat yourself up!”

As I looked at that photo and reminisced my own statement, I felt as if God was saying, “I feel the same way every time you beat yourself up.” It became clear that Gideon’s bruises were an outward reflection of my own inward beatings. Meaning the damage my son does to himself is visible; but over the years, I’ve done so much more invisible, self-damage with every harsh word and criticism.

Just like I don’t want Gideon to hurt himself, God doesn’t want us to hurt ourselves either. He created us in His image! Psalm 139 says that we were “knit together in our mother’s womb” and therefore we are “fearfully and wonderfully made.” Zephaniah 3:17 says he “delights in us… and rejoices over us with singing.”

Honestly, I’m not sure how we can stop Gideon from hurting himself. I can’t hold his hands down 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. But I do know that, for myself, I can stop any further damage. I can replace Satan’s lies with God’s truth (Zeph 3:17 and Psalm 139 are great places to start!) I can re-read great resources like Lies Women Believe. I can seek guidance and prayer from some great accountability partners.

It’s simple, really. For those of us who don’t have a genetic disorder, it comes down to a choice. We can choose to believe what Satan thinks about us or we can choose to believe what God and His Word SAYS about us.

I think it’s important to also mention that little eyes are watching and little ears are listening. Our children know how we feel about ourselves. And studies show that our self image can spill over onto them. That concerns me for my 4 year old daughter.

It’s for that reason that I hope and pray that no one will ever again have to tell me, don’t beat yourself up!



8 thoughts on “Don’t Beat Yourself Up

  1. Hey Samantha, it’s been a while since I’ve commented on your posts. Gideon is getting so big I love all the photos of him, he’s just so cute! I love your post today. Sometimes I feel like a failure at everything because I cannot do anything perfect. but then it always reminds me we aren’t perfect, Christ was the only perfect man. We will never be perfect until the day Christ complete’s His work.

    Philippians 1:6 “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”

    But until then in order to do anything some what right we need God’s assistance. I heard this saying once that if life was easy/perfect we wouldn’t need God. But it a blessing that it’s not because it forces us to draw near to God and call out to Him.

    I’ll continue to pray for you guys. Give those little bruises lots of kisses =)

    1. Thanks friend! Love your photos as well!! And Philippians 1:6 is a great verse. I so appreciate your wisdom and encouragement!! I will kiss the mess out of those bruises. He’s such a sweetie. 🙂 God bless!

  2. Wow. I guess I needed to hear that today. Your blog is always a great reminder of how much God loves me. It is no secret that I love Jesus, but don’t appreciate much of the community that is classified as “Christian” for a number of reasons. You remind me constantly that there are loving, kind, real, honest people out there who love Jesus too, and don’t pretend. =D

    1. Thanks Patricia. He does love you! 🙂

      I think people often buy into the belief that once you’ve asked Jesus into your heart then life will forever be easy. Following Christ means exactly the opposite. Pain and suffering is inevitable. Christ suffered and so shall we. To pretend this life is easy robs God of the glory He deserves. It’s through our weakness that his strength is shown.

      I’m so glad you found some encouragement from our journey. I want my son’s life, no matter how long, to turn people’s eyes towards Jesus. Thanks for reading. 🙂

  3. Hey girl! I met you at Bounce Town today. I enjoyed reading your blog and look forward to following you and your family throughout your blogging. Thanks for being transparent! In doing so, countless will see Christ through you, just like I did today. I am blessed through meeting you!

    1. Carrilee, it was so nice meeting you as well!! Thank you for your kind words & encouragement. Hope you guys made it home safely! Maybe we’ll bump into you guys again someday. God bless you and yours!

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