Running errands is often times no fun. Unless you’re running errands with Laynie. After having a surprise lunch with daddy today, I decided we needed to stop by the bank. And of course, in the middle of speaking with the bank teller, Laynie announces to God and everybody within ear shot, that she has to “go pee AND poop.” Yes, everyone, that’s my darling little lady there. Never a dull moment with this one.
Funny conversations with Laynie seem to always take place in the bathroom. I have her on video singing “You are my Sunshine” while pooping. Of course that means every other word was grunted (somewhat close to pitch actually). But today’s “dirty talk” began when she pointed to the little silver box (ladies, you know the one) and told me with such confidence, “Mommy this is where the coupons go.”
My daughter is 3 and a half. And let me just clarify, she’s 3 and a half going on 21. She knows the pledge, she’s memorized the Lord’s prayer, she can spell and write her full name, & many of her stories begin with, “Mommy, when I was a baby I used to….” She knows so much! And like every parent, I think she’s the smartest kid I know. In fact sometimes she’s so smart, I forget she’s just a child.
Last night’s conversation was one of the hardest conversations of my life. Given our son’s condition, we prayed and felt led to tell our daughter what was going on. How do you tell a child so young that her brother will die? How can a child so small possibly come close to understanding what that really means?
As I was rocking Gideon, the opportunity arose, and my husband and I went with it. We told her that Bubba has a genetic disorder called Zellwegers. We told her that most people grow really old before they die and go to Heaven. But because of this genetic disorder, Bubba would be very young when he goes home to Heaven to meet Jesus. We paused to see how much of this she was processing and she immediately replied, “But I’m not ready for him to go to Heaven.”
We are never ready for death are we? It seems like the people we love the most are always the ones gone too soon. For every family, death is sad: and let’s be honest, it’s down right hard and unfair. But for those who know Jesus, there is a hope in death because we know it is not the end.
As we finished that conversation, I asked Laynie if she wanted to stay and pray with us. And without hesitation, she took my hand and her fathers hand; and with Gideon still in my arms she began to pray, “Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom and the power, and the glory forever. Amen”
Did you hear that? Thy will be done… She doesn’t know it yet, but she’s already praying for God’s will. My heart is filled with joy even in the midst of my sorrow. She’s a daily reminder of the woman I want to be. I want her to know without a doubt that God is still good. That our world can come crashing down around us, and yet we can still say Praise Jesus, for He is good! I’m sure we will be having many more conversations with Laynie. It’s my prayer that every single one of them points her in the direction of the cross.
I’m hoping you’ll join me in talking with your kids, not just about the hard stuff, but about life and Christ. Let’s live everyday as if this is the last time we have to tell them about Jesus. It’s easier than you think. But be cautioned, they’re GREAT at spotting our hypocrisy. Let’s also practice what we preach.
Blessings to all.
I so clearly remember our “moment” when your baby girl was on her way………and now we already SEE what a blessing she is. At one moment I’m so very sad for you…then another I KNOW that Jesus will do great things with the four of you!!!!!!!!
Thanks Jane! I love our “moment” and I love you!!
What and absolutly amazing child!
Thanks Kristin! I’m partial!! Lol. 🙂
Hi there! You don’t know me but I just want you to know that every blog that I’ve read on here has completely convicted me ( in a good way!) what you are writing is making an impact in my life, in case you ever doubt! Thank you!
Thank you Sheena! It means so much to know that, because I sometimes have my doubts about my writing. Although this has been so healing for me in my journey and I never imagined many people would even see it. Thanks for taking the time to read my blog. God bless you!
I am amazed and inspired by your family. Your children are very blessed to have such godly examples. Please know that your Abbett friends and family are praying for you and are here for you. We may not always know the words to say, but we think of you often.
Brittnee, thank you so much! It blesses my heart to know that Kevin has such an amazing school family! Sometimes words aren’t even necessary and as awkward as it may be, you tell the Abbett family they can hug Kevin any time they feel led! Don’t let Kevin’s hard exterior fool you guys, he’s a big softy! We feel your love and encouragement and we are so grateful! Love you guys!! Thanks for taking the time to read my blog!
Samantha, God has clearly given you sufficient grace to handle this horrific time in your life. I love your blog and what an outlet it is for you to share with so many people.
Thanks Vicki! God’s grace has been so good. 🙂 Miss you!
How amazing this is. I am so thankful to Christ for who he has formed you to be. I am so encouraged by you, Sam. Love you.
Always praying.
Thanks Bre!! I love you to the moon and back!
What an amazing testament to you and Kevin teaching her about our savior. That she can do at 3 1/2 what most adults struggle with- praying for God’s will…I love that sweet girl. Hugs to all of you!
Thanks Linds! Love you sweet friend!
Love you my sweet Sam. Sending lots of love and big hugs to you and your family…
Thanks Cassi!! Love you too!!
Mama Laughlin sent me your way and I just want you to know what an inspiration your Faith is. Your family will be in my prayers from this day on and I just want you to know how incredibly amazing you are for putting God’s will before your own in such a difficult situation. Stand on your Faith to get you through these trying times. God loves you and so do I! <3
Jenny, thank you so much for taking the time to read my blog! Brandi is a wonderful friend and has the biggest heart. Thank you for your encouragement and prayers. We so appreciate them. I love you too!! God bless!!
Samantha, you don’t know me, but I had to reach out and just say thank you. I teach 1st Grade Faith Formation (I still call is CCD) and have two beautiful daughters that keep me busy. My oldest sounds like your Lainey. Smart and you forget that they are still children. She is almost 9 and still I forget she is a kid with her words and thought process. It is these kids that help teach us to remember to be patient with what we have in front of us and best yet, to be our inner self. They don’t realize that the world can be a cruel place. I have watched two friends give their sons back and they were by far the hardest times for me. Yet, remembering that they are children of God and his children first is such a great help in this world. Thank you for sharing your story with all of us, even those you don’t know. May the Lord continue to bless you and your family always.
Jennifer, thank you so much for taking the time to read our story. I appreciate your kind words and encouragement so much. You have blessed my heart. And I am grateful. I know we haven’t met but you feel like a life long friend. 🙂 have a great day!
I am sobbing after reading that post. How sweet is she. The Lord is moving through her in GREAT ways!!! May the Lord bless you and keep you, may he make is face shine upon you, and give you Peace. Praying for you and your family and for the Lords will to be done!
Thanks Kristen!! I appreciate you taking the time to read our story. And thank you for your encouraging words. My baby girl is pretty sweet!! (Of course I am partial). God bless you!!